Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Stress & Mess helps me Pay it Forward to Bless!

When I feel overwhelmed by a situation, holiday or even emotion, I find it best to just sit and write. Though sitting and writing don't make the tasks any easier nor does it allow them to get done any quicker. However I find blogging a form of meditation. When I sit here I am focusing on this very moment and not allowing those 15 or 40 things to get to me or overwhelm my emotional state. I can sit here focus on this very task and allow my mind a brief break from the rest of the world. Even though I am focused on the typing my subconscious is working on a solution to multi tasks the things that need to be done. i can sit here and know that when I get up I will approach the situation with more love and positive energy. I'm beginning to feel better already. A friend of mine once said, "I write because others are wrong." I loved her little sang.

This past month or several moths have been quite interesting around the house & farm. We are slowly beginning to pack and sort more of our 'stuff' out to simplify and begin our move either into a camper or possibly our parents home. Some is by choice, but most is due to financial and current circumstances. We received the first of many I yet to come of a Foreclosure threat. The home will be foreclosed upon in 6 to 9 months, but possibly a little longer as the mortgage industry is overwhelmed with those in the same or similar situations.

The previous owner of our home had died unexpectedly at 37 and because of this the house was sold 'as is' and nothing... and i do mean nothing had to be disclosed by his mother whom held the rights to the estate. We can no longer continue to sink money into the home let alone pay the mortgage. In the past 6 months we have had two electrical fires, a water pump go out, pipes break and/or leak, a sump pump in need of replacing, a flooded basement and on and on. I thought it was getting better till the other night when we had temperatures below freezing. I heard a loud bang in the wall and my gut said a pipe had just bested open. Sure enough a pipe upstairs running to the shower and bath on an inside wall had pretty much exploded. We still do not have water in the entire upstairs or for laundry... and I'm running out of clean clothes. Tom has the valves to those shut off to avoid further water damage. It will be several days before we can even get around to cutting a hole in the wall and repairing the situation. When the previous owner remodeled some parts of the house and built the addition on upstairs, they did so without any zoning or codes. Now there is NO access to the pipes or behind the shower. Yippie lol. Tom will be cutting a hole in our bedroom wall to get to the pipes and a hole in the bathroom wall to fix the damage from the freezing water expanding all over. It will be a task and I hope to get some help from a friend that has some plumbing experience. Hiring a plumber is not in the current financial budget. ;-) And it's the week of Solstice & Christmas of course. It was solstice night that the pipes burst, I was hoping for a little better gift or sign from the universe lol. I guess that's just how things go sometimes. Makes us a little more happier about the move and view things a little differently. Part of us will be glad to get the heck out of this money pit but on the other hand we do love this old farm house and property and have spent over 7 years trying to make it a home. It will be sad when we are forced to make the final move away from here. I try not to question though as I firmly believe in following the universal flow of things. Everything happens for reason no matter how negative or positive and I must accept what is and do the best with what I can.

Despite all the financial and home hoo-hass (icky stuff) I still try to do what I can to help others. A while back I was 'payed forward' when my cat child was in need. Though he is no longer with us, I remember those whom were there to help both emotionally and financially. I try to pay it forward when I am given the chance. Today I had just that chance. I met with my aunt today about 25 miles away so I could drop a gift off for her granddaughter. We met at Waffle House for coffee as it was right off the main highway she was traveling. We opted for lunch when I got there. The pregnant waitress we had was ending her long shift of I believe she said 9 or so hours. She was in a kind mood and made us laugh quite a bit. She held herself in high spirits despite her hard working that day, the 12 hour shift of Christmas eve and her 9 hour shift on Christmas day. Her child and husband had already celebrated and opened gift since she was going to be working so much during xmas eve and xmas day. I really felt for the situation and was humbled at her attitude towards all of it. Last week I had received a cash gift of $50 from my father in law. How very nice of him to send a gift from Florida. I always feel guilty and have a hard time purchasing anything for myself. So much in fact that Tom will get down right angry with me. This year I found it easier than normal. I did not buy an article of clothing for myself, I didn't spend it on a 'made in china' toy or novelty. No... this year I decided to pay it forward. Upon getting the bill for lunch (there were four of us and my aunt didn't know Waffle House only accepted cash), it was a good thing I had that $50 on me for lunch. I decided to give her everything I could in a tip (but kept $10 for gas if I needed it). I handed her a total of $40. There was $20 for the bill and $20 for her. I told her keep the change and when she looked at the money, looked at the receipt, looked at the receipt again, looked at the money again and then a huge "OMG Thank you!" came from her mouth and heart. That was my gift, the gift of giving. It felt better than any old piece of crap that I didn't need. She was shocked and said that was the largest tip she had ever received while waitressing. She continued to thank and I told her not a big deal, it was my way of paying it forward. She was tickled and said she too tries to pay it forward when she can. I believe this is a system we should all live by. Helping each other or a stranger. Not just financial as in this case but emotionally and respectfully as well. It does come back ya know. Karma is a beautiful thing for those with a whole heart and no judgment of a person. I didn't know her, I didn't know her life if she or her husband used drugs or were abusive. I didn't ask these things and I assumed but didn't prejudge that the didn't. I didn't know giving her the money what she would do with it, because I didn't care and it wasn't up to me. It's her choice and I simply have the comfort and overwhelming feeling of gratitude from my deed. That's really all that matters is two people walked away from a situation feeling 'richer' and better than before. Ya for me.. I spread some love today and made positive vibrations that have a huge ripple effect.

I am so glad I took the time to sit and type this. See, I told you blogging is like meditation. I am in a wonderful mood and even though the house is still a mess, I feel great and know it will eventually get done before tomorrow.

On a cool note, Miss Destiny got another piercing as part of her solstice gift. She loves piercings and since they can be removed if she later chooses, I don't have a problem with them. For her they are a way to express herself and I totally get that as a young mother. Besides, I think they rock and since I can't wear any metals or have piercings she can. lol I'll just keep getting the tattoos when I can afford them. ;-) Here is Destiny with all of her piercings. The one at the top of her ear was done in August at the Bears Den, a tattoo parlor in Marysville. The bottom piercings where she has the hoops were done when she was four years old. Yesterday she wanted second holes above them so we made a trip to the mall and as part of her solstice gift she got new holes in her ears. She opted for the 4mm titanium studs. Too cute!

I'm off to do some more Domestic Goddess duties. We have family coming over tomorrow that celebrate the christian version of the birth of the sun/son. We celebrate the light of the sun on the ancient sabot of solstice, they celebrate the son of light. Gotcha thinking now? ;-)

Have a blessed Yule, Christmas, late Solstice, Kwanzaa or what ever else your celebration be. May your holiday and season be merry and filled with memories galore.

Rainbow Tree

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